I have been trying to get Lucas to become more interested in church. Beyond the fact he is going to need to start going to religious ed in the near future and I don't want him to be the kid who asks, "Who is Jesus?", we need to go to church. I was raised in an amazing parish and the parish I belong to here is just as good.
So a few weeks ago I went, alone, to the 10am mass. It was great! Not just the fact that I was alone but mass really was good. The homily was good, our pastor was funny as always and I got to sit next to and share the sign of peace with one of our local TV personalities who is a parishioner. We have two local celebs in our little parish.When I got home I told Lucas that he really should have gone with me. Like a seasoned mom I didn't wait for him to ask why but went right into all the reasons he missed a great mass.
First, the bell choir was there. Our parish hired a new music director several months ago and I have to say that while I don't like the pomp and circumstance he brings to masses, the bell choir is a neat addition. Lucas loves them! When he has gone with me to church and they happen to be "performing", he is so intrigued by them. Score one Mom!
Second, there weren't many kids there. Now this might not seem like a draw but with fewer kids there, fewer went to the Children's Liturgy. So the odds of being picked to carry the Bible to their meeting were pretty good. Of course when I told Lucas this, I was hoping it would get at his need to be picked for the "special jobs". He was more concerned about finding out what the Bible was. Epic parenting fail. Score one Lucas.
Third, it was Donut Sunday. 'Nuff said.
I certainly hope that this little helping of guilt makes him rethink church.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Friday, May 25, 2012
Finally! An update.
Yep-it has been a long time since my last post. And yes, I had previously promised that would never happen again. Oh well.
We managed to move through fall without too many issues. Lucas loved being at his new old day care center and seemed to thrive in the four year old room. He was quick to tell us all the dirt-who wasn't listening that day, who didn't eat their lunch, who got hurt, etc. He doesn't miss much. We did the typical holiday things-pumpkins, Thanksgiving, Christmas and Hanukkah. We traveled to Buffalo for the winter holidays and had a great time as always. Despite the calendar saying we were in winter, Pittsburgh didn't get much snow this year. So our time playing in the snow and sliding down our front hill was limited. We also entered the super hero phase of being a little boy. If he wasn't pretending he was a super hero, he was playing with his many super hero figurines. Have you ever noticed how poorly acted the original Batman TV show was? Do you think they could have spent a little more time making Bruce Wayne a mask that he could actually see out of?
Spring was another set of adventures and it seemed like Lucas grew up over night. He was starting to suddenly make all these adult type comments and connections that left both Marc and I looking at each other asking, "Did he really just say that?" Here is one gem for you:
I have a potty mouth, especially when I drive. "JC" is a frequent utterance. I know I need to clean it up. Marc had taken Lucas to a Purim festival at his parents' temple in March. As they were coming out of the activity room, Lucas noticed that it was snowing and stated, "Jesus Christ, is that snow?" After Marc got home and told me about the outburst, I took a few minutes to laugh and then realized it was inappropriate. Not just because my four year old was essentially swearing but he was doing it at a temple. Bad, bad, bad. I knew he got it from hearing me. The next day on the way home from day care I decided to have "the talk" with Lucas. I told him I wasn't mad (he is over sensitive) but wanted to know why he said what he said. He didn't really answer me so I said was it because he has heard me say it when I am mad. He said yes. I told him it wasn't a good thing to say, that I shouldn't say it either and we both need to work on not saying it anymore.
That would have been all fine except that Lucas is starting to go to the special children's lituragy at my church. Clearly they will mention Jesus. So I needed to let him know it was OK to say it when we were at church.
His response: So it is only OK to say bad words in church Mommy?
Other funny remarks include talking about how he was nervous to meet us when he was in my belly. He thought and thought and thought about what we would look like and he didn't know if he was going to know what we looked like or if he would recognize us when he came out.
Lucas is very interested in having a little baby brother or sister. A friend from school just had twin sisters born and the kids have been crazy with excitement about their arrival. As is typical for kids, Lucas wasn't initially grasping that I can't just give him the type of baby he wants. I think he is finally OK with that idea but said the other day that it is OK if I don't have the right baby the first time, I can keep trying until I have the right one. Sure . . . .
We managed to move through fall without too many issues. Lucas loved being at his new old day care center and seemed to thrive in the four year old room. He was quick to tell us all the dirt-who wasn't listening that day, who didn't eat their lunch, who got hurt, etc. He doesn't miss much. We did the typical holiday things-pumpkins, Thanksgiving, Christmas and Hanukkah. We traveled to Buffalo for the winter holidays and had a great time as always. Despite the calendar saying we were in winter, Pittsburgh didn't get much snow this year. So our time playing in the snow and sliding down our front hill was limited. We also entered the super hero phase of being a little boy. If he wasn't pretending he was a super hero, he was playing with his many super hero figurines. Have you ever noticed how poorly acted the original Batman TV show was? Do you think they could have spent a little more time making Bruce Wayne a mask that he could actually see out of?
Spring was another set of adventures and it seemed like Lucas grew up over night. He was starting to suddenly make all these adult type comments and connections that left both Marc and I looking at each other asking, "Did he really just say that?" Here is one gem for you:
I have a potty mouth, especially when I drive. "JC" is a frequent utterance. I know I need to clean it up. Marc had taken Lucas to a Purim festival at his parents' temple in March. As they were coming out of the activity room, Lucas noticed that it was snowing and stated, "Jesus Christ, is that snow?" After Marc got home and told me about the outburst, I took a few minutes to laugh and then realized it was inappropriate. Not just because my four year old was essentially swearing but he was doing it at a temple. Bad, bad, bad. I knew he got it from hearing me. The next day on the way home from day care I decided to have "the talk" with Lucas. I told him I wasn't mad (he is over sensitive) but wanted to know why he said what he said. He didn't really answer me so I said was it because he has heard me say it when I am mad. He said yes. I told him it wasn't a good thing to say, that I shouldn't say it either and we both need to work on not saying it anymore.
That would have been all fine except that Lucas is starting to go to the special children's lituragy at my church. Clearly they will mention Jesus. So I needed to let him know it was OK to say it when we were at church.
His response: So it is only OK to say bad words in church Mommy?
Other funny remarks include talking about how he was nervous to meet us when he was in my belly. He thought and thought and thought about what we would look like and he didn't know if he was going to know what we looked like or if he would recognize us when he came out.
Lucas is very interested in having a little baby brother or sister. A friend from school just had twin sisters born and the kids have been crazy with excitement about their arrival. As is typical for kids, Lucas wasn't initially grasping that I can't just give him the type of baby he wants. I think he is finally OK with that idea but said the other day that it is OK if I don't have the right baby the first time, I can keep trying until I have the right one. Sure . . . .
Monday, September 19, 2011
We shouldn't have to ask
My sister and I recently had a discussion about balancing fulltime work, being a mom and being a wife-and all responsibilities that come in each of those roles. She had had an unusually busy week at work the week before and one night it ended with her in tears. She felt like she wasn't being a good mom or a good teacher because of all the things that were going on. My BIL (who is great by the way) tried to comfort her and replied to her statements by saying, "All you needed to do was tell me you needed me to pick up; you should have just asked." My sister replied back, "I shouldn't have to ask."
I feel that way more and more. Working Moms should not have to ask-for help, for someone to pick up the slack for them when their work schedule is crazy. I shouldn't have to ask.
I don't think that some partners of working moms get it-we struggle. Working 40+ hours a week in any job takes a majority of you time. As my boss says, we spend more time with each other at work than we do at home. Then we come home and for the most part, we then have to catch up with the kids on how their day went, get dinner ready, clean up after dinner, think about what dinner will be for the rest of the week and prep, clean up the house and then maybe, just maybe, get a chance to look at the paper or enjoy some down time with the family.
So when we get overly irritated because something is out of place or someone hasn't put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher, it isn't because we are emotionally out of control or can't handle anything. It is because we shouldn't have to ask that someone else take care of the issue. We shouldn't have to ask.
I feel that way more and more. Working Moms should not have to ask-for help, for someone to pick up the slack for them when their work schedule is crazy. I shouldn't have to ask.
I don't think that some partners of working moms get it-we struggle. Working 40+ hours a week in any job takes a majority of you time. As my boss says, we spend more time with each other at work than we do at home. Then we come home and for the most part, we then have to catch up with the kids on how their day went, get dinner ready, clean up after dinner, think about what dinner will be for the rest of the week and prep, clean up the house and then maybe, just maybe, get a chance to look at the paper or enjoy some down time with the family.
So when we get overly irritated because something is out of place or someone hasn't put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher, it isn't because we are emotionally out of control or can't handle anything. It is because we shouldn't have to ask that someone else take care of the issue. We shouldn't have to ask.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)