We shouldn't have to ask

My sister and I recently had a discussion about balancing fulltime work, being a mom and being a wife-and all responsibilities that come in each of those roles. She had had an unusually busy week at work the week before and one night it ended with her in tears. She felt like she wasn't being a good mom or a good teacher because of all the things that were going on. My BIL (who is great by the way) tried to comfort her and replied to her statements by saying, "All you needed to do was tell me you needed me to pick up; you should have just asked." My sister replied back, "I shouldn't have to ask."

I feel that way more and more. Working Moms should not have to ask-for help, for someone to pick up the slack for them when their work schedule is crazy. I shouldn't have to ask.

I don't think that some partners of working moms get it-we struggle. Working 40+ hours a week in any job takes a majority of you time. As my boss says, we spend more time with each other at work than we do at home. Then we come home and for the most part, we then have to catch up with the kids on how their day went, get dinner ready, clean up after dinner, think about what dinner will be for the rest of the week and prep, clean up the house and then maybe, just maybe, get a chance to look at the paper or enjoy some down time with the family.

So when we get overly irritated because something is out of place or someone hasn't put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher, it isn't because we are emotionally out of control or can't handle anything. It is because we shouldn't have to ask that someone else take care of the issue. We shouldn't have to ask.