We shouldn't have to ask

My sister and I recently had a discussion about balancing fulltime work, being a mom and being a wife-and all responsibilities that come in each of those roles. She had had an unusually busy week at work the week before and one night it ended with her in tears. She felt like she wasn't being a good mom or a good teacher because of all the things that were going on. My BIL (who is great by the way) tried to comfort her and replied to her statements by saying, "All you needed to do was tell me you needed me to pick up; you should have just asked." My sister replied back, "I shouldn't have to ask."

I feel that way more and more. Working Moms should not have to ask-for help, for someone to pick up the slack for them when their work schedule is crazy. I shouldn't have to ask.

I don't think that some partners of working moms get it-we struggle. Working 40+ hours a week in any job takes a majority of you time. As my boss says, we spend more time with each other at work than we do at home. Then we come home and for the most part, we then have to catch up with the kids on how their day went, get dinner ready, clean up after dinner, think about what dinner will be for the rest of the week and prep, clean up the house and then maybe, just maybe, get a chance to look at the paper or enjoy some down time with the family.

So when we get overly irritated because something is out of place or someone hasn't put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher, it isn't because we are emotionally out of control or can't handle anything. It is because we shouldn't have to ask that someone else take care of the issue. We shouldn't have to ask.

Happy 4th birthday Lucas!

Hard to believe that Lucas turned 4 just over a week ago. He has been trying really hard to be patient, especially since we have lots of birthdays leading up to his. We would have an unofficial countdown for him-after Bryce's, mommy's, daddy's, Andrew's, Bapa's and finally Grandma's, it would be your birthday! Of course he thought that the day AFTER Grandma's birthday meant it was his. Silly boy.

The few days leading up to the big event was filled with lots of special things-Thursday he got to spend the day with Grandma because his daycare was closed. Friday he spent the day with me which included a trip to my office for about an hour. Saturday, which was his actual birthday, my parents arrived for the weekend which meant lots of time playing with my dad and putting puzzles together with my mom. We had a mini celebration with singing and a candle in his dessert. It was nice to celebrate with just the few of us. Sunday was the big day! My sister and her family came down just for the day and they joined the Rosen side of the family for all the fun. With 5 boys between the ages of 11 and 4, it made for lots of chasing, running and play fighting. Good times.

When I look at Lucas now I really see the boy he will become. He doesn't have the baby features mixed in with his big boy face anymore. It really is amazing. He is definitely starting to look more and more like the Rosen side than my side of the family tree. His eyes go back and forth in terms of color. If he is wearing brown or dark colors they look brown. But when he wears lighter colors they are green. A much darker green than mine. I think he would have a striking face if he was a green eyed, blond hair boy. I can dream.

He is officially in pre school now since the school year started. We love being at our old center again. We continue to get good reports on how he is doing. I hope that remains the same throughout the year.